By: Bo Sanchez

Yes, If You Use Your Own Prayer Language.

Do you struggle praying daily?
I did. For years.
But no matter what I felt, I prayed anyway. That was the “teaching” and “rule” for good
Christians like me.

So each day, I went into my room and talked to God.

30 minutes, I was taught. So 30 minutes I did.
Some days, it was Ok.
Some days, it was like being root-canalled.
Or lipo-suctioned. (Just in case you’re wondering, I’ve never experienced it, but my friends tell me it’s torture.)

During those difficult days of prayer, every part of me wanted to get out of that room. I felt so dry. So empty. So distant from God.

And I didn’t know why. Why did I feel so depressed?
I simply concluded it was the spiritual dryness that saints experienced regularly (Ahem.) I read that St. Therese of Avila had spiritual dryness that lasted for 20 years. Who was I to complain?

Until I stumbled upon what I now call “Prayer Language”.
Today, I realize that perhaps many people’s spiritual dryness come from simply not loving themselves. How? By not respecting their own personality, not listening to their needs, and not using their own prayer language.

My Spiritual Arrogance

Once upon a time, I thought there was only one way of praying: My way!
My way of praying meant going to a room, sitting down or standing up, and singing, listening, and talking to God. For years, I’d teach people to do this exact same thing. I called it “Prayer Time” and it had only one definition—Mine.

I remember a woman who said, “Bo, I do my gardening every morning. And when I do, I imagine Him gardening beside me. Surrounded by the fresh air and the beauty of the flowers around me, I spend time with Him. As I dirty my hands with the soil of the earth, I’m blessed. And I feel so refreshed each morning…”

I frowned at her. I said, “That’s nice. But you still need a formal prayer time where you go into a room—and then sit down and stand up. And then use A.C.T.S.—Adoration, Contrition, Thanksgiving, and Supplication…”

Forgive me Lord for my spiritual arrogance!

Perhaps a part of me looked down on anyone who was having too much fun in their prayer life. How could she when I was suffering through my prayers?
I never saw that she was probably closer to God than I was.

Because God made her a gardener. And He was meeting her in the garden. God was talking to her with the prayer language He gave her.

What Is Your Prayer Language?

I still meet people who insist that others pray the way they pray.

“You should go to the Blessed Sacrament and kneel for an hour…”
“You should pray in tongues…”
“You should pray the Liturgy of the Hours…”
“You should pray, worship, jump, and dance like in a prayer meeting…”
“You should pray the rosary…”
“You should pray in quiet, emptying your mind…”

All of the above are prayer languages.

But never the language.

There is no such thing.

Today, I tell people to discover their own prayer language.
I did.

And boy, did I feel relieved that my prayer language wasn’t going into a room and doing the A.C.T.S. No wonder I had great difficulty! I felt disconnected.

My Prayer Language?

Here’s what I do for my daily time with God….

In the morning, I walk out of the house and pray in tongues. That’s just a few minutes of walking slowly, absorbing the sunlight, and inhaling God’s Presence and the beauty of the new day. I claim the blessings of the day. I pray the Novena to God’s Love prayer.

Why do I pray outside? Because I love nature. I feel God’s Presence much more outdoors than indoors. That’s just how God made me.

I then go into the house, fire up my laptop, and “pray” my Dreambook. This is a 15-page document that lists my ultimate mission in life. (My mission in life is composed of 4 words: “To Communicate God’s Love”.) It also lists my long-term dreams as well as my goals for the year. Why do I pray this way? Because God designed my psychology as a “futurist”.

And then, I start writing. I write my prayers, my reflections, and my insights. When I do this, I feel God’s Presence in a very palpable way. Why? Because God made me a writer, and writing is my prayer language.

I no longer struggle much when I pray.

I love praying. I have fun.
Because now, prayer can be all these activities and more.
Because I’m not stuck with one way of praying.
Because I’m using my prayer language—the language God gave me.
Because prayer is a relationship, not a fixed set of things to do imposed upon me by other people.

Hey, I’ve now come to respect the prayer languages of my friends too…

Examples of Prayer Languages

· One of my friends is a music lover. So each morning, he plays his worship CD. And he sings along for the next 8 to 10 songs, worshipping the Lord. He tells me that this prayer time really connects him to the Lord.

· My athletic uncle jogged daily. (He’s 80 now, so he’s slowed down.) But for years, he ran for miles. And he told me that each morning, he’d talk to God like the Almighty was jogging right beside him.

· A friend loves quiet. She walks to a nearby chapel and spends quiet time before the Blessed Sacrament. She loves it.

Praying Creatively In Difficult Circumstances
Some friends pray in creative ways by the force of their circumstances. In my immature days, I used to judge them, insisting that they “find” proper time for God. Today, I’ve come to admire them very much…

· A friend lives in Sta. Rosa Laguna and travels two hours to work and another two hours going home. She can sleep only 4 hours a day. But thanks to the heavy roadwork now in South Luzon Express Way, her relationship with God has been repaired too. Half of her travel time, she sleeps. And the other half, she turns the bus into her private chapel.

· A new mother can only grab snippets of prayer when she makes her baby sleep. Her “lullabies” are worship songs.

Friend, are you having difficulty praying daily?

What is your prayer language?

Tell me about it in the comments below. And share it to the world too. Someone might get encouraged by your way of praying.

Originally Posted by jamesparmis

By: Bo Sanchez
Until I stumbled upon what I now call “Prayer Language”.
Today, I realize that perhaps many people’s spiritual dryness come from simply not loving themselves. How? By not respecting their own personality, not listening to their needs, and not using their own prayer language.

WTF???!!!!Not because some people don't wanna have illusions of a non existent being doesn't mean they don't love themselves, don't respect their personality and do not listen to their needs. Dude, people are different from one another, if you chose that boring life of yours beginning it chanting words for some non existent being, then fine, do it, if that whats make you happy, but I think you should just stick to that routine of yours you call life, and lay off with judging others.

Jabo - I dont think Jamesparmis was meaning to judge anyone. I think he was referring to religious people encountering "spiritual dryness", not agnostics or athiets. You can definitely love yourself and have a fulfilling life without being spiritual - like you said, it is just a way of life.

Jamesparmis - I think what you are saying is definitely truthful. I have always felt that praying should be like talking to a friend and that worshipping should be something we should be happy to do - but we shouldn't force ourselves to do this if it makes us unhappy.

I listen to Christian music in my car. I commute 45 minutes to work each way. So for an hour and a half each weekday, I sing along and worship God in my own way. I also say little prayers all day long. If I see an accident on the side of the highway, I pray for those people. If I have a problem at work - like I can't figure out how to code something - I say a prayer asking for God's help. If something good happens, I say "Thank you God".

The Bible says not to pray like some do with long drawn out meaningless prayers. It also says "Pray without ceasing". How do you do that? I think the way I pray is how I feel like I accomplish this.

im not sure really how people are meant to pray. but i think its a personal thing and should be done to your own preference.
i think its comforting more than fun

I find that prayer in tongues is what really brings the presence of God wherever I am. Jesus gave us that ability and we should use it.

Originally Posted by nic

im not sure really how people are meant to pray. but i think its a personal thing and should be done to your own preference.
i think its comforting more than fun

good call. i would have to agree with this guy. i'm a christian and pray every day. i find i can't live without doing it.